It’s gotta be tough to have your whole life on display like that. Sister Wives star Christine Brown noted during part 2 of the season 13 tell-all special that the show makes them all very aware of their past behaviors, and leads them to feel pretty exposed. She told the host, SuChin Pak, that doing the TLC show makes them “vulnerable.” Check out the video above to see her comments.

“I feel like in smaller families, you can get away with a bit more,” SuChin said to the wives and Kody Brown. “But in this setting, it’s hard I think, to sort of … Because someone else may catch what another person didn’t catch and not let that slide.” Christine, 47, agreed. ” I think you’re more accountable. You have to be more accountable.”

She continued, “Because you’re so vulnerable. I think we’re all pretty vulnerable. And it’s, like, this show makes you vulnerable, too. Like, you’ll watch episodes of yourself and just be like, ‘Oh, my gosh. I can’t believe I was like that. I can’t believe I was misbehaving.’ That’s just ugh. You’re just vulnerable.”

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The Browns have been pretty open this season about some of their strained relationships, and that does have to be difficult to watch again months later. On the same tell-all special, Christine and Meri Brown revealed that they’re still working on theirs, and Christine admitted that she hates going back and watching some of the tough conversations she and Meri previously had to try to work out their issues.

But ultimately, the Browns did sign up for this. They chose to put the big moments on display — whether those moments are happy occasions like a wedding or the arrival of a new baby, or something difficult like the family’s move to Flagstaff, Arizona in which cameras definitely caught many of the family members in emotional moments. Vulnerability isn’t always a bad thing, after all. Having that vulnerability on display for the whole world is just something the Browns will have to continue to contend with if the show returns for additional seasons.