He’s opening up about his struggles. Breaking Amish star Jeremiah Raber released a vulnerable new video on YouTube called “My Dark Secret Revealed.” In the six-minute clip, Jeremiah confesses that he used to cut himself on his arm and chest, having only recently quit.

“It’s something that a lot of people don’t understand,” the TLC alum, 39, began while addressing fans. “I thought I would talk about something that was shown on this last season of our show, and that is you guys saw how I had cut here on my stomach or on my chest or whatever.”

Jeremiah said that he often tried to cover up his left forearm because he would cut there, noting how he also had cigarette burns in that same spot. Jeremiah admitted that’s why he decided to get so many tattoos on that area of his body, before explaining why he’s sharing his story.

Breaking Amish Jeremiah My Dark Secret Video
Courtesy of Jeremiah Raber/Youtube

“So many people love to judge when they hear or they see that somebody is a cutter,” the TV star continued. “That is the worst thing you can ever do, and I will tell you why. You probably can cry with tears very easily.” The Return to Amish alum said it’s hard for him to show his emotions and there’s a lot of other people that also struggle to cry, so it’s not helpful to just tell them to “quit.”

“They can cry, but they don’t have tears, so there is no way for us to relieve the pain, the pressure that is building up, except for with a cut,” he elaborated, noting how it’s gives them feelings of solace, and it’s not always just someone’s way of pleading for attention.

Jeremiah said the best thing to do in that situation is to have a heart-to-heart conversation with that person, so they don’t build a wall around themselves. “That blood is our tears,” he said. “There’s a lot of people that do, so don’t feel like you’re different,” the reality star added, while sharing a word of encouragement with anyone facing the same obstacle. “Just never give up,” Jeremiah concluded. “There’s always hope. Keep looking forward and that’s the only way to go.”

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