Fans were surprised to discover Kailyn Lowry invited ex Chris Lopez to son Creed’s birth in July after she previously banned him from the delivery room, but the MTV mama says she wouldn’t have “been able to be OK with herself” if she didn’t give him the “opportunity” to show up for his son. While speaking exclusively with In Touch ahead of Teen Mom 2‘s season 10 premiere, she explains her thought process behind the decision.

“I just feel like, if I didn’t allow him to be there in that moment, I would never have the opportunity — neither one of us would have the opportunity to take it back or change it,” Kail, 28, tells In Touch. “I never want my child to question why I didn’t allow their dad to be there. And I feel like, even if things don’t work out with Chris or he decides not to coparent with me … nobody can ever say that I didn’t allow him to be there and to try to be a parent.”

'Teen Mom 2' Star Kailyn Lowry Is Pregnant, Expecting Baby No. 2 With Chris Lopez
Courtesy Of Kailyn Lowry/Instagram

The mom of four admits she was also motivated by her lingering romantic feelings. “I think love makes people do crazy things,” she says. “I truly believe that [Chris is] the first person that I’ve ever really loved in a real way. And so I think that that’s played a huge part in, you know, me being so forgiving and me giving him chance after chance. … [But] I’m hoping those days are coming to an end.”

In April, Kail admitted on Instagram she was still “struggling” with their breakup. When a fan asked her for advice on how to move on from a relationship that didn’t work out, the star only had empathy to offer. “When you figure it out, please let me know,” she said. “Because same.”

She similarly reflected on her relationship with Chris, 26, in March when allegations surfaced that he cheated on her with another girl from his past. When fans pointed out that Kail was the one who went back to him after their previous breakup, she “accepted her stupidity” for giving the romance another shot. Though she hinted Chris’ actions made it clear he wasn’t going to “commit” to her and their family — the parents share newborn son Creed and older son Lux — it “took her a while” to reconcile his behavior with what he was telling her.

Kail and her ex will always have a complicated relationship thanks to their past. Despite that, she’s hopeful that they can make coparenting work even when their romance didn’t.

Season 10 of MTV’s Teen Mom 2 premieres on MTV Tuesday, September 1 at 8 p.m. ET.

Reporting by Emma Hernandez

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