Courtney Stodden the New Marilyn Monroe? Might Just Be Possible

Real Talk: Courtney Stodden is the new Marilyn Monroe, and if you're clutching your pearls at that, you need to doubletake on your idea of Marilyn Monroe. Sure, we know superficially, the bleached hair and boob job have made Courtney Stodden Monroe-esque over the last few years. No doubt did the singer and socialite take some inspiration from the Golden Age goddess. But the two also are bound by similar scandals and lifestyle choices. You can side-eye Courtney's figure-hugging wardrobe all you want, but those clinging lamé dresses are absolutely fit for a 2018 Marilyn.

Courtney clearly idolizes the actress, which definitely has something to do with all of her mirroring. In fact, the former teen bride visited Marilyn's grave in 2016 to honor the anniversary of the starlet's death. She came equipped with white roses and a handwritten note. "If I could wish you a star and make my dream come true, it would be that you and I could've met one day," she wrote. "I know that's impossible because we're two girls from completely different eras, but if I could bring you back for just one day, I'd tell you how much you're missed." Awww.

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Now, we're sure that you're willing to argue that Courtney Stodden is more like the new Marilyn-obsessed Anna Nicole Smith. Positing that theory, you could argue that the bosomy Anna Nicole was the new Jayne Mansfield. And in saying that, you could say that Jayne Mansfield was the new Marilyn Monroe.

So according to Hollywood law, Courtney has earned and inherited the role of the new Marilyn Monroe, case closed.

Ok, if you really need some convincing, it helps to remember that despite Marilyn's status as a timeless and classic icon, she was also simultaneously scandalous and a quite vulnerable woman. Perhaps she would have found a soul sister in young Courtney. No doubt the 23-year-old has found a sister in Marilyn. Below, a sampling of traits the blonde bombshells have in common.

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Marilyn Monroe got married as a teenager.

The world was shook when the then 16-year-old Courtney Stodden married the very middle-aged Doug Hutchison. Honestly, we still get skeeved out by it from time to time. As it would turn out, Courtney's biggest scandal was also an early Marilyn move: Norma Jeane Mortenson was married at the age of 16 to James Dougherty. Marilyn's husband was also an older man, albeit only by five years, and hearsay is she called him "daddy" (which, gross, but relevant).

Marilyn Monroe was no stranger to plastic surgery.

Marilyn Monroe was undeniably gorgeous, even in those old shots of her younger years. Don't kid yourself, though, not everything on her face was a triumph of good genes. In 2013, medical records were auctioned off insinuating that Marilyn had work done for her chin and nose.

As for Courtney, she's come clean about her cosmetic surgeries. More than that, she even filmed her nose job inviting the whole Entertainment Tonight team into her operating room.

They both believe fashion should be form-fitting and sky high.

Courtney gets a lot of slack for her provocative barely-there bodycon minis. Honestly, though, Marilyn didn't become a sex symbol because she was wearing potato sacks — you'd rarely spot her in public without a wiggle dress.

And though Courtney's stripper heels seem extra, Marilyn was a big champion of a stiletto. In fact, she wasn't doing modest kitten heels: she elevated her 5'3'' height by four inches. No one could tackle that kind of lift in 2018…except for Courtney, of course.

To be honest, both basically constructed themselves into bleach blonde bombshells.

Marilyn is the ultimate platinum queen, blondespiration for generation to generation. You know what else she was? If you couldn't deduce from the previous pictures, here it is: not a natural blonde. Marilyn had curly, reddish-brown hair as a teen. She switched over to the light side in 1946, and was so obsessed that she allegedly bleached her pubic hair, too. Consistency!

As for Courtney relics from her teen years (which are super trippy to look at now), showcase the scrawny little girl with strawberry blonde hair. But if you double-take on Courtney between dye jobs, there's no mistaking: those roots are dark.

They've both stripped for the camera.

The big difference, granted, is agency. Marilyn Monroe agreed to be photographed nude when she was struggling in the early aughts of her career. She made $50 from it. Years later, Hugh Hefner bought the photos for $500, put them in the inaugural issue of Playboy and the rest, as they say, is history.

Courtney, on her end, has been photographed nude or next-to-nude (that girl loves her pasties) plenty of times. She also willingly starred in her own sex tape Courtney Uncovered, and might share something else with Marilyn in common on that end. Allegedly, there's a sex tape floating around out there of the actress and the Kennedys.

Ultimately, Marilyn and Courtney are two delicate women who knew how to make their sex appeal into a brand.

It's a heavy burden to bear, one that no doubt contributed to Marilyn's self-destruction, but someone's got to do it. We love poking fun at the extra antics of Courtney Stodden, and yet her methods and path are only exaggerated, of-our-time takes on what Marilyn would do. For better or for worse, Courtney's used her sexuality and well-constructed image to capture the attention of a nation, and free from Doug, she's doing it on her own terms. And that first part? It definitely makes her a thoroughly Modern Marilyn.