Despite the fact Jenelle Evans rose to fame by broadcasting her private life on Teen Mom 2, many fans still don’t know much about her dad. The 25-year-old mom-of-three admits that she doesn’t have a relationship with her estranged father and hasn’t seen him in years.

“Robert Evans was only in my life for a little while. For that short and glorious time, I was daddy’s little girl,” Jenelle wrote in Read Between the Lines: From the Diary of a Teenage Mom. “I loved and admired him. I still do in some way. Without warning, everything changed, and my dad cut himself out of my life.”

Ugh, our hearts are breaking for Jenelle. We hate that she doesn’t have a relationship with her dad. And, she even explained how she believes that her parents’ dysfunctional relationship contributed to the way she dealt with relationships in her own life.

“Having been in and out of my own troubled relationships, I can only guess at what their marriage was like,” she continued. “It was rocky enough not to last, and that says enough on its own, I suppose. I wished I had paid enough attention at the time. So I could watch for the same signs in my own life.”

And she hasn’t seen her dad since she was a kid so she doesn’t really know why he chose to walk out of her and her siblings’ lives. Her siblings — Ashleigh and Colin — said that their dad was a mean drunk who abused their mother and did “uncomfortable” things to them when intoxicated.

“To this day, I don’t know if my mother forced him out of our lives or if he just didn’t want us anymore,” she added. “I can’t help but think it was a bit of both. I still love him, but deep down I think I will always be that heartbroken little girl waiting on the porch for her daddy to come and pick her up.”