Britney Spears broke her silence about her conservatorship in a passionate speech given via Zoom during a court hearing on Wednesday, June 23. 

“I’ve lied and told the whole world I’m OK and I’m happy,” the pop star, 39, admitted to the judge while speaking on her own behalf. “If I said that enough, maybe I’d become happy … I’m in shock. I’m traumatized … I’m so angry it’s insane.” 

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Britney pleaded for her life back over a decade after her conservatorship was established in 2008, following her hospitalization for a public breakdown on the heels of her divorce from husband Kevin Federline. Britney and Kevin, 43, now coparent their two children, Sean, 15, and Jayden, 14.

Her father, Jamie Spears, previously served as conservator of her person and conservator of her estate until September 2019. At that time, a judge approved her longtime manager Jodi Montgomery in a temporary role amid Jamie’s health issues.

While Jamie handed over control of Britney’s personal affairs to Jodi, he has continued to serve as the conservatorship of his daughter’s estate, which Britney and her team have strongly opposed. Due to the opposition, the judge ordered that Jamie would have to share equal power over Britney’s estate with the firm Bessemer Trust in February 2021. 

“A lot has happened since two years ago, the last time I was in court,” Britney recalled during her June 23 court hearing, claiming she was previously forced to do a tour in 2018 and also had to change her medication. “I don’t think I was heard on any level when I came to court last time,” she continued. “Not only did my family not do a goddamn thing, my dad was all for it.”

Britney was vocal about wanting all of her statements to be public, adding, “They’ve done a good job at exploiting my life. So, I feel like it should be an open court hearing and they should listen to what I have to say.” 

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The “Sometimes” singer said her conservatorship has made her “scared of people” and untrusting. “It’s not OK to force me to do anything I want to do … I truly believe this conservatorship is abusive. I don’t feel like I can live a full life,” she noted, claiming it impacted her personal choices with boyfriend Sam Asghari.

“I have an IUD in my body right now that won’t let me have a baby and my conservators won’t let me go to the doctor to take it out,” Britney said, revealing she wants to sue her family and is tired of being “enslaved” by her father.

After a brief break during the hearing, Vivian Thoreen, Jamie’s attorney, read a brief statement for Jamie, which said, “He’s sorry to see his daughter suffering in so much pain.”

Lynne Spears’ attorney, Gladstone Jones, said Lynne is a “very concerned mother” after hearing Britney speak. He implored the judge to heed Britney’s request for her to be able to hire her own private attorney and to change her current care plan that has been in place under the supervision of Jodi.

Fans have been looking for updates regarding her conservatorship following The New York Times Presents’ episode titled “Framing Britney Spears.” 

At the time, she took to Instagram to address the portrayal of her court drama, writing, “From what I did see of it I was embarrassed by the light they put me in.” She noted, “I cried for two weeks and well … I still cry sometimes.”

Reps for Britney, Jamie and the Bessemer Trust did not immediately respond to In Touch’s request for comment.

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