It’s Kind of Amazing How Much Jordyn-Grace Duggar Hates Her Mother Michelle

The crux of Jordyn's problems is that she's baby number 18.

And I want to make a special stress on the number there, because the cameras were rolling for then-17 Kids and Counting when Michelle was pregnant with baby 18. Jordyn wasn't born a person, she was born a +1. Having 17 older siblings already lends yourself to getting lost in the pack, and Michelle looooves babies (like, as a concept). In fact, she loves babies so much that it was a matter of months before she got pregnant with Josie…

This is compacted by the fact that she lives under the shadow of baby number 19, Josie.

This is talked about a lot, so here's the general gist: Josie is Michelle's "miracle baby" and probable favorite. Jordyn literally had a year of bonding time with Michelle, and that's rounding up since when Michelle is pregnant the focus is all on the next little ~blessing.~ Immediately after Josie was born, Michelle had to focus all of her energy on taking care of a sickly child, literally removed from the Duggar compound for a period of time. How can a toddler even comprehend that?

And naturally following Michelle's return home there was constant doting on Josie who still had residual health issues and was still revered for her survival. Now, that doesn't mean the Duggars haven't exploited the hell out of their youngest child, nor that Josie didn't require that extra help. It just means that lauding Josie as Michelle's clear favorite has made Jordyn's status as number 18 even more of a curse.

So basically, Michelle wasn't really there when Jordyn needed her.

Understatement of the century, of course. However, let's cite a fairly popular Duggar moment as an explanation of that. When Jordyn goes to get her teeth cleaned (chanting, "mommy, mommy mommy!" all the way) Jessa is the one by her side through most of the scary stuff. The more I watch the scene with the x-ray, the more harrowing it gets. She's so little, so round, so unnecessarily subjected to this weird dentist procedure.

Here's what really breaks my heart, though, and I literally never noticed it until my recent rewatch. Fearful little Jordyn, tears in her eyes, her mouth being invaded by strangers, starts making an upset face. Then she looks to Jessa and asks, "Can I have my mom?"

I'm crying.

Jessa, left to comfort her while Michelle's doing IDFK what, is like, "It's ok, it'll be really quick." The dentistry, not the parental neglect. That'll be more of a slow burn.

Which reminds us, Jessa is Jordyn's sister-mom, and therefore her REAL mom.

Jessa was Jordyn's buddy leader and they definitely formed a tight bond since Jordyn didn't have, you know, an actual mother figure growing up. That's why she took it so hard when Jessa left the nest.

"The other day the Seewald family was visiting, and Ben and Jessa were getting ready to leave with them," Michelle wrote in a 2014 blog post. "As Jessa and Ben were getting in the Seewald car my little Jordyn, who is five, realized what was happening and she just started to cry and cry."

WELL YEAH, BECAUSE THE ONLY PARENT SHE HAS IS GOING AWAY.

"She was worried that Jessa was leaving for good," Michelle says. "I had to comfort her and reassure her that Jessa wasn't married yet, just going for a visit." Then Michelle, mother of the century, decides to calm down Jordyn by saying soon Jessa would be procreating and giving Jordyn lots of new friends. Um, Michelle, competing with other babies is literally Jordyn's entire life already.

Jordyn probably wishes Dolly Parton was her REAL mom.

In an old episode of (technically) 18 Kids and Counting, the Duggars go to Dollywood and Dolly Parton is obsessed with baby Jordyn. I've seen screenshots of the county superstar trying to adopt Jordyn ("I'm just going to take you! They've got too many children already!") and it doesn't compare to how cute — and yet somewhat sad — the actual video clip is. Jordyn is glowing and giggling at Dolly.

I'm bringing this up not just because it's genuinely awesome — Dolly Parton is a treasure — but because it hints at the problem with the Duggars' familial suppression of affection. Dolly is interacting with this baby in such an animated, attentive, playful way. At the Duggar Baby Factory, no non-Josie child gets that kind of undivided love.

Like let's be real, Jordyn doesn't remember this interaction because I'm pretty sure that's not how babies work. It's, however, incredibly telling. Because of the way the Duggars are raised and because Jordyn's placement in the family is primo for being overlooked, seeing her soak up this moment is such a contrast to the Jordyn we know now.

Not that this singles her out, but she's probably way too young for her jurisdictions.

Look, we know that all of the Duggar kids work together to run the household so Michelle doesn't have to. Those tater tot casseroles aren't going to cook themselves! Nevertheless, I am personally offended by how Jordyn's childhood got tossed away so early under the guise of her being such a good "helper." There's one congratulations video of Jordyn that's like 3 seconds long and she's doing a load of laundry bigger than she is.

What, why?

So let's talk about her birthday celebrations. For some reason, she has to share her special day with Josie and Mackynzie.

Every time I watch this clip I get a big headache because it pretty much starts with, "Well, today is Jordyn's birthday, but since Mackynzie and Josie are the same age we're gonna throw them in there too." If that sounds confusing, please remember that Josie is premature. Her birthday is Dec. 10, Jordyn's is on Dec. 18, so technically Josie is less than a year younger than Jordyn. Big "technically" there.

It would be aggravating enough to double-up like that but when you add in Mackynzie, who isn't even one of Josie's sisters, it's just insulting. Mackynzie's birthday is Oct. 8th. Why the hell is someone with a vastly different star sign included in this?

Also not for anything, but it really looks like Josie got to blow out most of the candles and that's bulls–t.

Now to the good stuff: Jordyn's 2016 birthday video.

Oh man, this is practically an art piece, I love it so much. Basically, in this now-iconic video a very salty Jordyn pops her gum as Michelle tries to remember anything unique about her. She settles on this:

"Jordyn is such a loving little helper, and she's always eager to jump in and help mama or Jana or Joy…" Michelle pauses to remember her other kids' names. "Any of the older kids, Anna…" Not your child. "She's always willing to jump in and help and she loves, loves, loves to carry little babies on her hip. And she is instant friends with a baby."

Michelle says some more nonsense and throws in that she loves Jordyn's "heart to serve" but Jordyn's ferocious side-eye says it all: "You don't know a f–king thing about me, lady." It's here that the damage is truly evident… and in one fell swoop, Jordyn becomes a fan favorite.

And then if it couldn't get more obvious, we have Jordyn's 2017 birthday video.

Because of the way Jordyn is actually recoiling in the video, there were accusations that maybe Jordyn is being physically abused. It's really hard for me to say anything definitive on that, but abuse can take on many forms. One form is "extreme neglect," and from the way she reacts here, recoiling under a stranger's touch, that seems to be at work. This would've never happened with Dolly.

Credit where credit is due: Jordyn kind of smiles towards the end after they sing the birthday song, but she also literally backs into Jim Bob to avoid her mom's touch. Ice cold, Jordyn, I love it.

And let's not forget she has the most awesomely IDGAF expression in Michelle's 2017 Mother's Day video.

Johannah and Jenni look sort of non-plussed (Hannie is always the cross between Jim Halpert and the line-face emoji), yet Jordyn takes the cake. Her head is in her hands, her view is askew, she honestly can't believe they're paying lip service to the woman who raised approximately none of them, least of all her.

The truth is, we can act like these are new developments but Jordyn's hate for Michelle has been building for years.

Clever editing and her general cuteness work very hard at hiding this disdain. And yet if you're quick enough, you can catch that Jordyn, sweet and sad-eyed Jordyn, has been onto her mother's game since the get-go. There's a distinct lack of love there that's just a little bit different than what her other siblings are going through. But we're watching you Jordyn, and we're working hard on a great escape.

Someone get Dolly Parton on the line.

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