The romance! The roses! The ridiculously good-looking people!
One of the great things about The Bachelor is that it’s so predictably unpredictable; for 18 seasons (not counting The Bachelorette!) we have watched the drama and thrill of a man dating multiple women in a quest to find true love—all in front of a camera. Ahh, true love.
But still, we have a feeling that this season is unlike any before; you know, unless you count Juan Pablo, the bachelor, who is literally from the ninth season of The Bachelorette. Still, he’s unique in a lot of ways, too. For example, he’s the first minority star of the hit dating competition.
To celebrate this iconic and sure-to-be unforgettable season, we made our predictions on what we think will happen this season on The Bachelor.
1. Juan Pablo’s Daughter Camila Gets a Veto
It’s no secret that Juan Pablo’s 4-year-old daughter, Camila, is really important to him. So it would make sense that she gets to overrule any candidate with a veto—you know, just like the American government.
2. Lauren H. Makes a Dramatic Return To Tell Juan Pablo He Made a Mistake
We love a good trainwreck, but Lauren H. really gave us a run for our money; she spent most of the night crying about her ex-fiancé before having a full-fledge breakdown. Needless to say, she did not get a rose. We suspect that JP will be the next object of her
affection obsession, and she’ll be back to let him know.
3. On An International Trip, We Learn Nikki Isn’t a Nurse… It Was Just a Pick-Up Line
Upon introducing herself, Nikki explains that she’s a pediatric nurse and nurses use the heartbeat to determine a lot about a patient—and invite Juan to “see how nervous and excited she is.” However, when Nikki and JP go on an international trip and he needs CPR, we learn she isn’t really a nurse—it was all a pick-up line and a ploy to get him to touch her boob.
4. Kelly Leaves Halfway Through After Learning Juan Pablo Is Really a Cat Person
Kelly brought her puppy to the house and lists “dog lover” as her profession; upon hearing that Juan Pablo is more of a cat person himself, her heart is irrevocably broken, so she leaves the show.
5. Juan Picks Lucy—But She Runs Off to Live on a Commune
She’s a free spirit. She can’t be confined to societal norms such as shoes or reality TV dating shows!!
6. We Learn Christy Has a Secret Shrine of Juan Pablo Á la Hey Arnold
We’re not saying that Christy is a fangirl, but she’s definitely a Juan Pablo enthusiast. Not only did she show up in a white dress (FORESHADOWING!?), but she also tells him that she “would not be here if it were anyone else.”
7. Juan Pablo Runs Away With Allison Williams From Girls
I mean look at them! We just believe that two people that attractive deserve to be together.
8. On The Final Episode, We Learn Juan Pablo Has a Secret, Identical Twin
And also that he’s going to be the next bachelor on The Bachelor. And we get to look at that face for another season!