As we approach the one-year anniversary of the unexpected death of Lala Kent‘s father, Kent Burningham, the 29-year-old is reflecting on how another big change in her life has really helped her cope. The Vanderpump Rules star took to Instagram Stories on March 18 to share how she’s feeling after five months of sobriety, which quickly turned very emotional.

“Five months ago, I came to the realization that I am an alcoholic, and I am now a friend of Bill [Wilson, the co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous]” she said. “You will never know how much this program means to me. [It] has given me new life.” She went on to try to explain just how much she’s changed, and it’s so freakin’ inspirational.

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I really fucking miss you

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“Being in my right frame of mind every single day is truly incredible,” she said, explaining that even on bad days she can see the light at the end of the tunnel. “I know that tomorrow I’m gonna be okay.” That especially applies to mourning the loss of her late father. “I’m thinking a lot about my dad today,” she said, getting misty-eyed. “I just feel very very blessed that I think back on the time that I had with him and there’s no regrets … Even though I feel like half of me is gone, I know he’s looking at me and he’s f–king proud. I’m just really grateful that I had him as my dad.”

Lala went on to gush about how the AA program has allowed her to mourn her dad in the way he deserves, by remembering him with a clear frame of mind. “He taught me how to make light of situations and how to just be proud of being a woman,” she reminisced. “That man taught me the respect that I need to show myself, and that others should be showing me.” She ended off by thanking her fans for their unwavering support on this journey, and we couldn’t be prouder of her. Keep up the good work, Lala!

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