She may have been on The Hills: New Beginnings, but Kaitlynn Carter wasn’t used to being a star. During a new chat with costar Whitney Port held over Instagram Live, Kaitlynn opened up about how her life changed after her split with Brody Jenner and romance with Miley Cyrus — and how “mortified” it made her feel. With the attention suddenly all on her, she called the whole experience “such a wake-up call.”

“I just didn’t anticipate anything like this happening,” the 31-year-old said in a video Whitney, 35, titled “Getting Personal.” She continued, “What happened to me [was], basically just after Miley and I went our separate ways, I thought, ‘Okay, my life’s just kinda going back to the way it normally was for me when I’m on my own.’ … I had no expectations that anyone would give a s–t about me by myself. I had no plan in place. I didn’t think about anything.”

Instead, she found that fans and paparazzi alike were following her every move. “I’m used to it when I’m, like, with Brody or when I was with her, but never when I’m on my own,” she said. “My mind is just swirling.” In one particular incident, she described the feeling of going out to a bar — only to discover headlines the next morning linked her to a mystery man. “The narrative was so not what the actual situation was.”

Since then, she’s taken control of her own story and played a more active role in considering how her actions may come across. That doesn’t mean she’s been afraid to live her life, though. In February, Katilynn and ex Brody, 36, reunited for a trip to Bali to help celebrate a friend’s wedding. Though the move had fans talking, she wasn’t afraid to share snaps of their trek.

At the time, the MTV star also seemed to reflect on how her life had changed since stepping into the spotlight. “To be honest, the moment I landed [in Bali] was the first time I’ve felt FULLY like myself in a very long time, sort of felt like I came back to life,” she wrote in a since-deleted post. “L.A. has become a pretty heavy place for me lately — not really where I prefer to be anymore, but where I have to be for work.”

We’re glad to see that Kaitlynn is becoming more comfortable with her fame — and that she’s got good friends like Whitney who can lend an ear when she needs to talk.

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