It’s pretty safe to say that when you’re one of 19 children, you’re pretty much begging for attention all the time. Surely Jim Bob and Michelle can’t devote the proper amount of care to each child, so when one of them runs off and gets married, they’re pretty stoked. For an entire day, all 2,000 eyes are on them. Unless you’re Anna… then it’s only 300. #Awk. 

On this week’s brand new episode of Dishin’ on the Duggars, we take a deeper dive into the wild world of fundie weddings — from ceremonies and style to sloppy kisses and hand-holding, we’re getting to the bottom of it all. Tune in to the podcast in full above and get the highlights below!

What’s up with their quickie engagements?

There’s a theory that suggests the Duggars legit run down the aisle because they have, uh, urges.  

According to one reddit user, “Kendra [Caldwell] and Lauren [Swanson] said they were surprised” about getting engaged, “which makes me wonder if the boys talk to Jim Bob about having feelings or desires about women and Jim Bob doesn’t want another scandal so he goes and finds them a wife.” Another user quickly chimed in, adding, “I always had a suspicion of this too. Between Josh and Jill both having been quoted by others as ‘hormonal’ and ‘boy crazy’ respectively, and then their rather immediate courtships and marriages… it wouldn’t surprise me if Jim Bob uses his local celebrity status for that.”

In other words, these kids plan their wedding quickly so they can go bone.

Seriously… 2,000 guests?

Although the guest list has varied for each couple, the average number of people at a Duggar wedding hovers around 1,000. In other words, these poor newlyweds spend their entire day just saying “hi” to relatives… and their 20 children (probs). 

If they’re lucky, though, maybe they’ll at least get to sip on a root beer float. For Jill and Derick‘s nuptials, they had 3,000 of those bad boys! Imagine the Costco bill for that?

Who has the best dress?

There were some mixed opinions on this one, but for me, Lauren’s dress reigned supreme. She was all about business in the front and party in the back, which I respect. It was simple, classy, and dare I say… modern?! But, TBH, she’s already known for being quite the fashionista

Who’s next?

John David and Abbie Grace Burnett will supposedly (run) down the aisle on Nov. 3. Here’s to hoping their ceremony will be less “messed up” than Si and Lauren’s!

Subscribe here and listen to the entire Dishin’ on the Duggars episode above.

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