Since the huge success of Twilight, Kristen Stewart has been called out for being awkward while during press, but in an all-new interview, she tackled everything—from her relationship to her mistakes to her awkward media image—with nothing but poise and grace.
“I really like being thrown into the unknown and then finding my way,” she explained. “I don’t want to show someone something. I want people to watch me find something.”
Being “thrown into the unknown” is a good way to describe Kristen’s approach to like not only professionally, but also personally. She told Marie Claire that she “had no idea Twilight was going to be huge.”
“Dude, I have no idea what I’m doing, and that’s kind of what how I love it,” she said. “It’s fun not having so much control. It’s kind of a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants lifestyle—it’s fun but it’s scary as f*ck.”
Unsurprisingly, Kristen described falling in love—presumably with her on-screen love interest Robert Pattinson—sound equally thrilling.
“You don’t know who you will fall in love with. You just don’t,” she said. “You don’t control it. Some people have certain things, like, ‘That’s what I’m going for,’ and I have a subjective version of that. I don’t pressure myself…if you fall in love with someone, you want to own them—but really, why would you want that? You want them to be what you love. I’m much too young to even have an answer for that question.”
She is only 23, but Kristen has still had a lot of life experience. In 2012, her relationship with Rob came to an end when it was revealed that she was having an affair with the married director of Snow White and the Huntsman, Rupert Sanders.
While the Twilight star didn’t directly address her affair, she did offer cryptic insight on her life in the public eye.
“I stand by every mistake I’ve ever made, so judge away,” she said.
One facet of her life for which she is routinely scrutinized is her media persona—but as she clarified, that’s just because she’s being genuine.
“I have an embarrassing inability, seriously, of summoning fake energy…I’m just not very good on TV, and it’s not my main goal in life to get good at it,” she told the fashion mag. “People are like, ‘She can’t handle’—for a lack of a better word—‘the spotlight.’ No, actually, I can’t, and that’s totally who I am… so I totally agree when people say I’m, like, the most awkward person.”